Sisterhood of Angel Mama’s Magazine Issue 01 | September 2020
Robert Owen Michael Lee’s Story
Written & Photo by Lyndzee Lee
I thought I had the flu in February because the home pregnancy test had shown negative. I went to the doctor and they ran a pregnancy test and it came back positive. I was so scared at first because I had wanted to be a mommy for so long but I was getting married June 20th and already had my dress. All my appointments went well and we did the Harmony test to find out gender. We found out we were having a boy. The name we chose was Robert Owen Michael Lee. He was named after his daddy, great grandpas, great uncles, grandpa, and third cousin.
We were so excited, started getting things ready for our sweet boy.
I called the doctors office May 18th because I was having chest pain and cramps. I was told to take Tylenol and call back if it got worse. All week I suffered through chest pain and cramps. By May 22nd it got so bad I called again and was told to go to the ER. I got to the ER and my blood pressure was 250/100 something. They did a urinalysis, blood work, gave me baby aspirin, and Maalox. They told me I had protein in my urine which is a sign of pre eclampsia. They called my OB who directed them to call Maternal Fetal Medicine in Indianapolis. The hospitalist called them and was told to give me magnesium and a shot to strengthen my baby’s lungs. They sent an ambulance to get me.
I was admitted to St. Vincent Women’s Hospital in Indianapolis and monitored closely.
They informed me I wouldn’t carry past 32 weeks but they didn’t expect me to even get past 28 weeks. They did a second shot to strengthen his lungs and did routine stress tests to watch him as well as daily ultrasounds. I was told he was small for his gestational age. My placenta was aging and there was reduced blood flow from the placenta to the baby. May 31st they had been monitoring my sweet boy and he had several dips in his heart rate so they decided to do a c-section before it became more serious.They got me to the OR and couldn’t find his heartbeat so they immediately started the c-section. He was born weighing under a pound at 25 weeks 6 days. He came out breathing on his own. I was on magnesium so I wasn’t allowed to see him till the next day.
My now husband and I spent all our time in the NICU with him because a couple hours after he was born he had to be placed on a jet ventilator. He fought sooo hard. On June 3rd we were told he wasn’t getting any better and that things may be taking a turn of not being beneficial for him. We were woken up at 1:35 in the morning on the 4th and told to come to the NICU. I went down and was told his heart rate had dropped quickly. When I asked what his heart rate was the doctor informed me he didn’t have one. It broke my heart because I had just held him for the first time that day and now I was holding him for the last time. I have such a huge hole in my heart now, I wanted my sweet boy so badly and I don’t have him anymore.